


Episode 1 - Season 5 - Magnus

by tailsbeth



Series: Season 5 - Magnus [1]
Category: SKAM (Norway)
Genre: F/M, Gen, Mental Health Issues
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-05
Updated: 2019-03-05
Packaged: 2019-11-01 14:02:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 2,204
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17868629
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tailsbeth/pseuds/tailsbeth
Summary: Magnus Fossbakken is entering his final year of school and everything seems to be cracking, including himself. When the family have to come home early from their holiday because his Mum has another manic episode, Magnus starts a journey to rock bottom. He's scared, numb, frustrated and he has no idea how to handle it. When poor decisions make things go from bad to worse, Magnus has to learn how to get back up again and talk to the people who care for him.[Entry for Skam Big Bang 2019]





	1. tirsdag 17:12 [15/08/17]

Magnus takes a deep breath as he unpacks the suitcase on his bed. He unrolls t-shirts carefully, placing them back in their usual home in his set of drawers. He’s being particularly meticulous, flattening out creases he would usually leave behind.

[Music plays](https://open.spotify.com/track/51Yy4jTMPlq0Qwnn53id64?si=S3XcZ8zyRsuJaOn4oVPf3w) from a speaker next to his bed, his attempt to distract himself from all the thoughts trickling through his head. He should have seen the signs. He knew what to look out for. How did he miss it? How did any of them miss it?

His phone buzzes across his desk, Vilde’s name appearing on screen. He drops the pair of shorts he’s holding and quickly goes to his phone, replying to the text.

 **Vilde:** How is Spain? I miss you :( xxx

 **Magnus:** Having fun, little bro isn’t annoying me too much. Wish you were here. See you Friday xxx

Magnus bites his lip and glances at the polaroid that’s currently sitting on the desk. It’s of him and Vilde, at Noora and William’s housewarming party if he remembered rightly. He remembered Vilde telling him the whole story of Noora and William, how they hadn’t planned in moving in together so soon but they needed a space of their own. He remembered how her face lit up despite everything she was going through herself. Magnus didn’t know what he’d do without Vilde and that’s why he couldn’t tell her the truth.

A light knock comes from the door, and a shorter version of Magnus appears. His hair is shorter and his cheeks are a little chubbier. He sits on the corner of Magnus’s bed, his eyes gliding around the room. The room isn’t conventional, it’s long and thin with the double bed slipping in neatly at one end. At the other end, there’s one black wall with a few space posters, slightly ripped at the edges, where the desk sits. The other walls are a very pale blue and there are a few band posters with photos and tickets scattered amongst them. It’s particularly tidy with it being summer, usually there would be school work and a lot more clothes left all over the room.

‘What do you want David?’ Magnus asks his little brother, who is fidgeting with his hands.

‘Nothing. Just don’t know what to do. I put my clothes away.’

‘Well I’m still putting away mine.’ Magnus mumbles as he unrolls another t-shirt. David looks at his feet, just about touching the floor. Magnus shuts his drawer and sits on the bed. He gazes at his brother, his open suitcase between them.

‘Is mum still in bed?’

David nods, still looking at the floor.

‘I don’t like this. I don’t like when mum’s down,’ David pushes the words out. To most people, what his brother just said would mean nothing. Being down was a phrase taken very seriously in the Fossbakken household.

‘Do you think I do?’ Magnus bites back. David’s eyes widen at his brother. He stands up suddenly mumbling an apology before heading for the door.

‘David! Wait a second.’ Magnus calls out.

His brother stops at the door, a little fright in his eyes. Magnus gets up and puts his arms around David, enveloping in a hug.

‘I’m sorry. I don’t know what to do.’ He whispers as David hugs him back. A tear falls down David’s face, he tries unsuccessfully to hold in his sniffles. Magnus lets him go and wipes his face.

‘We stick together okay? Just like before, for mum.’

David nods at his brother. Magnus tries his best at a smile, anything to reassure his little brother.

‘I’ll finish up and we’ll watch a movie or something, go ask Dad if he wants to order pizza.’

David smiles at the suggestion and leaves the room, leaving Magnus alone again. He walks over to his window and peaks through the curtains. Every house on his street looks pristine, every garden without a weed in sight. He looks down at their own front garden, everything neat and tidy like the rest of them. Fine on the outside, he could manage that.

 

 

 


	2. onsdag 10:02 [16/08/17]

Magnus is making fried eggs since the kitchen is empty. Everybody is catching up on sleep after a chaotic day, but Magnus couldn’t sleep any longer. His eyes bored into the pan, focusing as the oil popped. He placed some bread in the toaster and poured himself some juice. The house felt calm, it felt like home just for a minute. Magnus sipped his juice as he looked around the empty kitchen. The forest green walls glowed as the sun peaked in, the colour had become his favourite after seeing it for so long. His staring into space was disturbed as the toaster went off. He quickly placed it on a plate, along with the eggs on top.

He took his breakfast to the table, which was handmade by his Granpa. Every time the rest of the family visited, Granpa would inspect the table and greet it like an old friend. Magnus would love for his Granpa to arrive right now. Anything to distract him.

He eats his breakfast as the light floods from the windows. Everything is quiet, and Magnus feels content, he knows it won’t last long so he drinks the moment in. Tries to remember every little detail, as if saving this happy place for another time.

As if on que, his dad and brother walk in. His dad is talking with the phone in hand and holding an open laptop with the other. He’s talking to the hospital, Magnus recognises the lingo. Medical jargon was a whole other language that Magnus was starting to become fluent in.

David is rattling a cereal box to get every last drop, the noise makes Magnus want to cover his ears. It sounds like cymbals to him after his mere moments of peace and quiet. David sits at the table, grunts a greeting at Magnus and puts on a YouTube video on his phone to watch as he eats. He crunches through the cereal at an accelerated rate, but barely pays attention to the actual bowl. Magnus watches in slight disgust, was he like that as a boy?

‘Magnus, can you go to the pharmacy today? There’s a lot there we need to pick up for mum.’

‘Well who else would it be for?’ Magnus replies as his dad sits down. He isn’t even sure where the sarcasm came from, it lounged out without permission. His dad furrowed his brow, just as baffled at his son’s response.

‘I mean, yeah I can. I’m done with breakfast, so I’ll just go now.’ He quickly grabs his plate and gets up from the table, puts everything in the dishwasher and exits the kitchen. He shuffles on some trainers in the hallway and grabs the biggest hoodie he can fine. Nobody can know he’s home. That would mean explaining the truth and right now he is too exhausted for that. He pulls the hood over his head and walks out the door. The door slams shut.


	3. Text - torsdag 14:05 [17/08/17]

**Even:** Mags! When do you get back from Spain? Get together at ours tomorrow night if you can make it.

**Magnus:** Don’t say anything to anyone please

**Magnus:** I’m back already. Got back tirsdag. Mum’s not great

**Even:** Want to talk about it? Coffee tomorrow morning?

**Magnus:** Yeah ok. Takk Even.


	4. fredag 09:22 [18/08/17]

[Magnus](https://open.spotify.com/track/0QcDrehXMQ02rAu1gefefF?si=UCzVTPopQyaib1zv0X9Jbg) sits on a bench, looking out onto the city. His eyes twitch from building to building. Even shows up after a minute, holding two coffees. He has a slight grin approaching Magnus. Magnus isn’t showing his usual messy mane of hair, it’s covered over by the blue hoody he wears, it’s a little on the baggy side. Even passes him a coffee as he sits down. Magnus gives him a nod. He taps his fingers rhythmically around the cup. His brain feels on pause for the first time in days. Without the confines of his home or family, he lets out a deep breath.

‘So, do you want to talk? We can just sit, if you want,’ Even suggests.

He is taking in a very different Magnus to who he has usually seen. In the year Even had known Magnus, he has had nothing but a smile on his face. Even is frankly unfamiliar with this person.

‘It just feels nice to leave the house I guess?’

Even nods and sips his coffee.

‘I know the feeling.’

‘Well yeah. I hope you don’t find it weird that I only told you about this. I get if you’re not okay talking about this stuff, it is pretty personal. I’d say to the guys but they just…’ Magnus rambles, coffee spilling slightly as he moves around.

‘Don’t quite get it?’ Even finishes his sentence for him as he places a hand on Magnus’s shoulder. He recognises the despair in his friend’s eyes.

‘Magnus, just let it out. Don’t worry about me.’

‘Mum stopped her meds. We didn’t know and went on holiday. After a few days, we had to come back. She was spiralling quickly and Dad only carries so much of a backup. At first, we just thought it was a holiday high, we were all excited. We’ve had false alarms before too. But then she stopped listening to us altogether and that’s when we really knew.’

He finally stopped for breath. He looks around to Even who just nods. Magnus can feel the guilt crawling up his throat, his mouth drying up. He quickly takes a glug of his coffee. Another thought distracts him.

‘What did you tell Isak when you left?’ He asks, blinking furiously. Even lets out a little chuckle.

‘That boy will be dead to the world until 12 at least. You’ve got nothing to worry about.’

Magnus smiles for a second before turning back to the view of the city.

‘I love it up here,’ Even comments quietly.

‘Me too. It’s peaceful.’

‘What about Vilde? She cares about you, surely you can talk to her.’

Magnus shakes his head. He places his coffee cup on the bench.

‘Vilde has enough to think about, I can’t just pile it on.’

Even’s mouth twists at Magnus’s words.

‘A relationship is a two way thing. Remember that.’

‘Wow, you sound oh so wise,’ Magnus widens his eyes, Even laughs at him.  Magnus joins in, the laughter feels funny in his chest but he lets it out. There’s too much of it for the moment but Even joins in.

‘Two years make all the difference, I guess,’ Even adds, raising his eyebrows.


	5. fredag 20:35 [18/08/17]

Magnus stares at the cup in front of him on the coffee table. There’s a slight foam on his drink, gathering at the rim. There’s a hum in his ears, a familiar beat easing in.

‘Magnus?’ Vilde’s voice crashes in along with a [song](https://open.spotify.com/track/0S7zL7ae0KpOSPKeFQpHo8?si=89ZXnWKBRY-EDHpNshLaqg) that usually makes Magnus smile.

‘Yeah?’

‘You okay?’

‘Yeah. Just tired, from all the travelling.’

‘We can go early if you want?’

‘Nah, I’m good. I missed you.’ He smiles as he speaks before giving a light peck on Vilde’s lips. He’s telling the truth, he can’t lie to Vilde. There’s a sparkle in her eye, a slight tilt in her smile. Her wine has kicked in. He grips onto her shoulder, caressing the small patch of skin that’s exposed. Vilde nuzzles in at his neck, her hair tickles him slightly. He plants another kiss on her head, lingering ever so slightly.

‘Drinking game anybody?’ Eva suggests, pulling out a fresh bottle of vodka from her bag. Everybody is highly enthused, gathering around the bed where Isak puts a tray down covered in plastic shot cups. Magnus gulps, he has barely touched his beer whereas everybody has a buzz going. He quickly downs his beer and goes to grab another from the kitchen. Even is pouring a glass of wine, he gives Magnus an innocent smile as he walks in.

‘How you doing? I’m glad you came.’

‘Me too. It doesn’t feel like we were only partying a few weeks ago here,’ Magnus replies, not wanting tread further than shallow small talk tonight.

‘I know. Summer already feels far away, right?’

‘Yeah, strange.’

Even goes to leave and stops, putting a hand on Magnus’s shoulder. He grips tight, rubbing his thumb over the curve.

‘Magnus, we’re always here for you, okay? Please remember that, all of us, not just me.’

Magnus feels his voice shrink away so he just nods with a naïve gaze. Even grins and pats Magnus’s chest.

‘Good. Get another beer, I think you’ll need it.’

Even leaves with a Cheshire cat smile across his face to greet the rest of the party. Magnus stands in the kitchen, listening to the dull piano of the next [song](https://open.spotify.com/track/36X1FKShGogxkwSQxWqoBj?si=rp3nTnFTTE6jrF3wTYn4Eg) on from next door. He remembers he came to get a beer and grabs one from the packed fridge. He leans again it, sipping routinely at his beer.

‘I shouldn’t be here,’ he whispers to himself. He blinks slowly, letting out a deep sigh.

‘Magnus! Come play!’ The boys call from the next room. Magnus’s eyes widen before he shakes his hair out and chugs his beer.

‘Coming!’ He walks through the doorway, as the music comes to a crescendoing chorus.


End file.
